Sideshow Alley Read online

‘Do you want that beer?’

  ‘You try so hard to corrupt me. First it was the Lemurs and now it’s beer.’

  ‘Don’t worry, if I was trying to corrupt you I’d offer my own services, but I understand Eric has asked you to marry him.’

  ‘Wow, so many choices. I think I’ll have the beer.’

  Colin left to fetch the drinks while Kyla talked to Jack and his pilot.

  ‘Have you got any tattoos like the other fighters?’ she asked, when he returned.

  He shook his head, ‘No, why?’

  ‘I thought you’d have one of Queenie for sure. What’s the matter, she not good enough?’

  ‘Actually I’ve never had better. Just one session with her and I sleep like a baby. So how’s your beer?’

  ‘The beer’s alright, although I’m not too sure of the company. That’s why I never changed my perfume as you suggested, it keeps the smell of Lemurs away.’

  ‘By that you mean on me, don’t you,’ he said, smiling.

  ‘If the cap fits,’ she quipped.

  Colin could see that Kyla was working herself up and he tried to diffuse it.

  ‘It’s not what it looks like, you know.’

  ‘I’ve seen you go off with her every night this week,’ she replied, angrily.

  ‘I suppose you’ve put one and one together and come up with three as per usual.’

  ‘It’s quite alright. What you do in your own time is your business.’

  ‘Still, I can see that your disapproval is driving a wedge between us.’

  Seeing Queenie nearby, he went over and whispered in her ear before returning. Kyla watched the brief encounter, her anger towards him rising rapidly as he stood before her again.

  ‘The question is—do you trust me at all?’ Colin asked.

  She looked at him incredulously, ‘Naturally—we’re a team!’

  ‘But only in the fighter it seems. Do you trust me with your life?’

  ‘Of course I do.’

  ‘But you don’t believe me.’

  Kyla’s anger had peaked, with no possible solution in sight.

  ‘Then come with me now. Trust me for just ten minutes.’

  Kyla’s eyes narrowed as she stared back at Colin and wondered what he could possibly do or say that would make her change her mind. She hesitated a moment longer before draining her beer and following him out of the mess.

  He took her to a part of the ship she was unfamiliar with, down the stairwell and along a corridor on the starboard side.

  ‘Where are we?’

  ‘Nearly there,’ Colin said, stopping to knock on a cabin door.

  Queenie opened it and invited them in with a sweep of her hand. Kyla stood there dumbfounded for a moment before relenting and following him inside.

  ‘Thank you, Queenie. Could I have the usual tonight, please?’

  ‘You’ve brought an audience as well,’ Queenie commented.

  ‘Kyla came to see if you’re as good as I said you were.’

  ‘Yes, I can see where she might be in need of my services, especially after the game today. Some of us girls made a packet backing her,’ Queenie purred.

  Kyla watched as Colin removed his t-shirt and lay face down on the table in front of him, then again as Queenie smoothed out the knots in his back, relaxing him as she did.

  ‘I thought…’

  ‘That he came here for some tail?’ Queenie asked.

  ‘Yes, I thought that’s what they all came here for.’

  ‘Yes, a lot do,’ Queenie conceded, ‘but there are others that just want a massage or the touch of another being and someone to talk to.’

  Kyla thought for a moment, ‘Tell me, John from Green Charlie Five. What did he come here for?’

  Queenie hesitated before replying, ‘I really shouldn’t be telling you, but the first time was for a massage, the second was for tail. For him it was just a confidence thing which has worked out rather well, don’t you think?’

  ‘Yes, quite,’ Kyla agreed. She looked around the small neat room with its bunk and en-suite, similar to her own cabin near the Pilots’ Quarters.

  ‘Colin’s finished. Would you like one as well?’ Queenie asked.

  Kyla swallowed her pride, ‘I may as well, now that I’m here.’

  Colin replaced his t-shirt and pulled his coveralls up, then turned his back while Kyla did the reverse. Queenie applied alternate pressure either side of her backbone to adjust the alignment before working her thumbs deep into the shoulder and neck muscles. Kyla closed her eyes and succumbed to her magic touch until all too soon, she was done also.

  ‘It seems I was wrong about both of you, I apologise. And thank you for the massage, it was great,’ she said, and quickly dressed.

  Afterwards the three of them returned to the mess together before they were missed. Colin collected another two drinks and gave one to Kyla. She accepted it without question and they separated to mingle with members of both Red and Green Alpha, while Queenie disappeared amongst the other crews.

  The most talked about subject of the night was their imminent inclusion into the war against the Lizards, and tactics were high on the list. Kyla was deep in discussion with the crew of Green Charlie One who was yet to be sold on the idea of the initial barrage when entering battle, so she called Colin over to defend the practice.

  When informed of the uncertainty, he said, ‘Any fight, be it between two people or a Squadron of Lizards, is won or lost in the first few seconds of it beginning. It is no use everyone loosing a shot to soften them up if they all shoot at the one logical point. What it does is give the Lizards an escape route and when they break up it’s down to one-on-one fighting which as you know can go either way.’

  The crew of Green Charlie One pondered Colin’s words as did the others around. There were supporters and detractors of the idea. The end consensus being that until they actually tried it they wouldn’t know.

  ‘Exactly,’ Colin said, ‘and as long as I’m Weapons Officer aboard Red Alpha One, that’s the tactic we will be using. If we are lucky enough to survive tomorrow we should have our answer.’ With that he left them to discuss it amongst themselves and went to talk to another group.

  There was no film that night owing to the end of course celebrations, Sami didn’t sell his wares, and anyone not mingling or looking morose was targeted by the hostesses. Kyla watched them work the mess and actually took the time to talk to Queenie briefly, something she never thought she would do. Eric noticed it too and was amused by what he saw, knowing it was very much out of character for her. He made a brief appearance amongst Alpha wing also to wish them good luck on the morrow. While he was there Kyla called Colin over to shake hands with him and patch up any rift there might be between the two.

  ‘You know that I’ve asked this wondrous creature to marry me, don’t you?’ Eric asked.

  ‘Yes, I had heard. That probably explains your behaviour towards me or anyone else that goes near her.’

  ‘A slight over-reaction on my part,’ Eric conceded, ‘wouldn’t you do the same?’

  ‘Maybe, she is a tasty morsel. Knowing she’s off the menu though, all I can say is thank god for the hostesses.’

  Eric laughed as they shook hands, ‘Look after her for me,’ he said, and walked off to rejoin his wing.

  Colin watched him go before turning to address Kyla.

  ‘He’s living in a dream world, isn’t he.’

  A look of surprise came over her face, ‘Why do you say that?’

  ‘Either we get shot down or you serve a second hitch, because so far I’m enjoying myself too bloody much. Fancy another beer?’

  Realisation set in on Kyla’s face. She shook her head slightly and watched as he walked away.

  A few of the wise called it a night earlier on, which left only the diehards to linger. Close to midnight the Prathkos moved in to end the celebrations peacefully and escort the last of them back to their quarters.

  Baptism of Fire

  The crews
slept soundly as the Carrier sped towards the troubled planet, using hyper-drive to propel it through the multi-dimensional layers of space. In the morning they were awoken by the call for special duty men to close-up, followed by another for the Karen to man the ship’s defences. Pee Wee ran to his station, while the Weapon Officers dressed and went to eat, expecting the launch siren at any moment.

  The mood in the mess was sombre, some still feeling the excesses of the night before. Both pilots and fighters spoke in low voices, all chilled with the prospect of the looming battle. They made short work of breakfast and grabbed a coffee afterwards—Colin shaking hands with Tiddles, Jimmy and the boys while they waited to be scrambled.

  An announcement came over the P.A., ‘All One Red Pilots report to Battle Command on Four Deck Golf. All One Red Pilots to Battle Command on Four Deck Golf—now please.’

  The crews in the mess watched as those nominated raced away, knowing they would be joining them shortly.

  Kyla and Eric ran down the corridor with the other Red Leaders hot on their heels. They descended the stairwell on reaching Golf section and then filed through the open door of the Command Centre to where the Colonel and other tacticians waited.

  The Colonel addressed them, ‘Now listen up everyone. Shortly we will be in position to deploy. We already know the enemy Carrier’s position and they are very much aware of us. Right now they’re beaming up as many unfortunate souls from the planet below as they can, in case they have to withdraw. There’s also a flurry of traffic to and from their Carrier as they get ready for battle. They’ll come at us as angry as hell, so be prepared.’

  The Colonel referred to a navigational scan of the area, pointing out the enemies’ position in relation to their Carrier and the area between, where the battle would take place.

  He indicated the areas of responsibility for the four squadrons.

  ‘The drones will be deployed just before you launch, so as soon as you’re out identify yours, then stay in the immediate area and protect them. Are there any questions?’

  No one spoke.

  ‘That is all, Gentlemen—to your craft and good luck!’

  The two-toned launch siren wailed throughout the ship to scramble the rest of the crews.

  Colin led the race up to the hangars and jumped aboard his craft. He slid the canopy back and put his restraining harness on while equalising the pressure within. Kyla joined him shortly afterward. They could see the drones being deployed to one side of the launch ramp as one-by-one the wings reported their readiness while waiting for the lights to change. Moments later they sped down the ramp and out into the brilliant sunlight. Once at the forming-up point Colin brought his VDU online and went straight to the Battle Screen. There was a squadron of Lizards already on their way and when the last wing was in place Kyla went to intercept them.

  ‘Wing Leaders identify your targets and stagger formation,’ Colin warned, and then gave the order to load proximity shot. The Lizards were still in a tight formation, intent on driving a wedge through them when Colin gave the order to fire. The enemy broke in all directions, but not before five of their craft were destroyed and another disabled. The rest of the Lizard fighters regrouped into wings and came at them determinedly, loosing rockets along the way. Colin gave the order for the wings to disperse further and engage the enemy.

  Explosions flashed all over the battlefield and it was just like being back at The Rock. A group of five Lizards made a beeline for the drone, their intention crystal clear when viewed onscreen. Colin directed that Red Alpha respond in staggered formation and load proximity again. The Lizards were single-minded in their objective and lost another two craft in the resulting salvo.

  Colin spoke into the battle comms, ‘Red Alpha Two, Three and Four go behind and use rockets, number Five follow me and we’ll intercept with laser.’ With that, Kyla adjusted her course and accelerated away with Red Alpha Five close behind.

  The central radio was alive with the screams and commands of battle from the rest of the wings as they engaged the enemy. Rockets took out another of the bogeys as Alphas One and Five opened fire with laser on the remaining Lizards. Another cart-wheeled away harmlessly, while the remaining enemy fighter lined itself up on the drone only to fire its rocket uselessly when the pilot saw another closing fast on his craft. He never did get a second chance.

  Colin searched the Battle Screen for the closest target and saw a Green Alpha fighter in trouble, with Lizards in hot pursuit. He went above them with Red Alpha Five still in tow, both descending on them firing laser all the way.

  A voice came over the radio, ‘Thanks Alpha One, I owe you a beer.’

  Just when their particular area of the battlefield seemed under control more Lizard fighters appeared onscreen, approaching fast. Colin guessed what had happened and spoke to Kyla.

  ‘They’ve pulled some of their fighters from other quadrants to try and stop us. They must think we’ll have a go at their Carrier.’

  Kyla glanced at her VDU, ‘Could be,’ she said, worriedly.

  Colin informed Bravo and Charlie Wings of his intentions before taking Alpha Wing to one side. He gave the coordinates for the approaching Lizard fighters and ordered a salvo to be laid in front and around them. It had the effect of taking out two of their craft and gave the Legion fighters the immediate upper hand.

  So far Alpha Squadron had lost three fighters and another had been disabled. The remainder had melded into a potent fighting force, firing salvos to decimate the enemy before closing with them to mop up. The other squadrons weren’t fairing as well, all suffering heavier losses while choosing to close with a ruthless enemy. The tide turned for them when the Lizards pulled fighters out of their patch to counter the threat of Kyla’s squadron.

  Command was busy on the radio issuing orders for them to counter with barrages after witnessing their effectiveness and the Legion’s fighters slowly clawed back supremacy. The few remaining Lizard fighters returned to their Carrier, moments before it withdrew from above the planet.

  The order was given for the fighters to return to the ship, where the crews remained on high alert until the Lizard Carrier disappeared completely from Battle Command’s long-range navigational screen.

  The P.A. came alive with a message of ‘Well done’ from Command, and news that there would be a debriefing session for the Weapon Officers in the mess at 1300 hours. The crews were stood down afterwards until further notice.

  After dismounting from her craft Kyla went over the outside fins and fairings to ensure they hadn’t taken any hits that required maintenance. There weren’t any, but others weren’t so lucky and their craft were already being worked on. Still others were being recovered from the battlefield after being disabled and left to orbit in the heat of battle. The crews of those craft having to suffer the ignobility of enduring the sounds of fighting via the radio until it was over.

  Colin approached Kyla, ‘So how did we end up?’

  ‘Bravo lost two, Charlie one, plus another to be recovered.’

  ‘It could have been worse. I wonder how the other squadrons faired.’

  The technicians were busy working on the scarred and battered fighter fleet as they walked past, both silent as they thought of friends and if they had survived the ordeal.

  On reaching his quarters Colin was relieved to find his mates had made it through safely and they greeted him like a long lost brother.

  Even Pee Wee was there, ‘Wow, you should have seen it, it was awesome!’

  They were interrupted by an announcement over the P.A., ‘All One Red Weapon Officers report to Battle Command Four Deck Golf. All One Red Weapon Officers to Four Deck Golf now please.’

  Colin, Tiddles and the other nominated officers raced out of their quarters and down the corridor.

  The Colonel was waiting for them as they filed into the Command Centre and the door was closed behind them.

  ‘Congratulations Gentlemen—you made it through the first day. Now tell me, how do you thin
k you went?’

  The Weapon Officers looked around while waiting for someone to speak. Finally the Number One of Juliet Squadron spoke up.

  ‘Shithouse, Sir.’

  The Colonel looked at him and said, ‘Oh, and why is that?’

  ‘We lost seven from the squadron, Sir,’ the officer lamented.

  ‘And just how did you do that?’

  The other officers looked on, glad it wasn’t them being grilled, but knew they wouldn’t come away unscathed.

  The officer in question was slow to reply, so the Colonel prompted him, ‘Well, was it the fighter you were in? Did it malfunction or maybe it was the pilot, if so I’ll get you a new one.’

  The young officer looked on, horrified at such a suggestion.

  ‘None of those things Sir—it was my fault and due to inexperience.’

  The Colonel let him off the hook and moved along to the Number One of Golf Squadron. ‘And what about you, six down and one disabled. What have you got to say for yourself?’

  ‘The same, Sir—lack of experience.’

  ‘And what’s your excuse, Mr Tiddles?’

  ‘I should have listened to Red Alpha One, Sir, and not tried the individual approach.’

  ‘You’re damned right you should have!’ the Colonel screamed, ‘you’ve all been picked because of the qualities you posses. You are the leaders and if you want the respect of your men, then you had better pull your fingers out or you’ll have no one left to lead. I want you to pay particular attention to the film clip at the debriefing after lunch—you can all learn a lot from it. That’s all, you may go.’

  They all made to leave, but the Colonel called Colin back, ‘May I have a word with you for a moment?’

  He waited until the others had gone before going to a locker in the corner and taking out a bottle of clear liquid and two glasses.

  ‘Another thing Prathkos is famous for. We always keep some for those moments that need to be celebrated. Will you join me?’

  He sat and indicated another chair close by.

  Colin sat also and took the drink when it was poured, ‘Thank you.’

  ‘So what did you think of today?’